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05/03/2002 Archived Entry: "4/1/02 - Prescott Day 2"

In the early morning, after the rain, it was as clear as the high Arizona desert can be. The air was intoxicating. Even though we had gone to sleep so late the night before, just about all the students were waiting for me at 7:30 for morning yoga.

We did a short set, followed with three Venus Kriyas (partner yoga). First, sitting back to back and chanting with the intention of the partners experiencing the chant as one shared sound emanating from where their spines were in contact. Then, we sat in silence and each couple synchronized their breath, breathing in and out together. Finally, we turned and sat in an easy sitting pose (cross-legged posture), knee to knee, palms touching, and looking into each other’s eyes. I asked them to see the highest, most fulfilled aspect of the person sitting in front of them, and then to mentally bless that person that they might achieve that highest aspect of themselves.

After breakfast, we talked for a while, until they had digested enough so we could do some more yoga. We did a gentle yoga set, in which they wound up picturing a golden white warm globe of light at their heart centers, as they were guided through loving themselves and their fellow beings. Loving themselves, even though they might feel that the self was unworthy of being loved. This was followed by a very vigorous pranayama (breathing set) which was intended to get them quite "high," which it did. Then I led them through a series of visualizations. Seeing themselves 5 to 15 years later, and living their lives in such a way as to be doing what they were born to do. I put them through many loops and turns to this vision, most of which were intending to firmly place the experience in the available part of their mind, so they could call it up again. There was communication between their current self and the more-fulfilled self. Guidance was given by the older self. And, finally, the older self was incorporated into the current self, to reside inside the heart, as a guide and mentor.

We took a break, and then went around the circle with each person sharing his or her experience. Ninety per cent of the participants experienced most aspects of the visualization. Smells, places, people in their lives, dialogue between the younger and older selves, etc. A fairly transformative experience for all concerned.

After the long circle session, we took another break. Enough talking. We did a silly trust game. Everyone lying on their backs in two rows meeting at alternate heads, with their arms up in the air. Then we slowly passed each person, lying on their backs down the long row of hands. Much laughter and joy. We had become a loving community. Then I began to speak. Much to my surprise, I spoke for a very long time, perhaps an hour.

After a lunch, and a long break, and another trust game. I spoke again, for another hour, or more. It just flowed, and the energy was crisp. They were fully present, and the talking was the right thing for the time. I found that I had much to share. A great deal to share. I realized later that it is time I embrace myself as a teacher. I am a teacher.

It is true that I am not perfect or enlightened. I have plenty of faults, which I am not even very good at accepting or dealing with. Nevertheless, I am a teacher. My stupid ego, however, does not want to accept that. It cries out, "unworthiness!" And then, more subtly, "arrogance!" But the fact remains; I have become a teacher. I have wisdom to share, and can create a profound experience in which to share it. Perhaps, it would be more correct to say that I have become a vehicle through which wisdom and experience can flow. But that is what a teacher is, a vehicle through which wisdom can flow.

I am also, sitting here, just me. Issues, aches, concerns, the whole human dance. I aspire to let it all go, to give it all to God, and to accept what comes with gratitude. And, indeed, I am profoundly grateful to be a teacher. It is a sacred trust. May I be worthy of it.